“You never have to feel this way again.”
This series showcases personal stories of addiction recovery and sobriety. Today’s edition features Elizabeth Jannuzzi, the author of the forthcoming memoir Sober Mom (She Writes Press, July 2026), which explores loss, motherhood, and recovery from alcoholism. Her essays have appeared or are forthcoming in The Rumpus, Under the Gum Tree, and other publications, earning her a 2023 Best of the Net nomination. She serves as program director at Project Write Now and connects with readers through her weekly Substack newsletter.
When and how did you get sober?
My sober date is January 8, 2011. I suffered from this disease for over 20 years, before getting sober at 38. At the time I quit drinking, I was a married mother of three young children, living in the New Jersey suburbs.
Because of my family’s history—my older brother was in recovery and then died at 21 after he relapsed—I knew that once I admitted out loud to someone how much I was drinking that I’d have to stop and go to Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). I’m forever grateful for the kind and generous women of AA who circled around me after my first meeting and told me, “You never have to feel this way again.” I haven’t found a reason to pick up a drink since that day in January 2011 when I finally put it down.
What was the turning point in your decision to get sober?
A marital indiscretion was my trapdoor into sobriety. My husband discovered I had a one-night affair. When that secret was coming to light, I also finally revealed that I was drinking vodka all day while taking care of the kids. My husband was relieved because he always knew that something was wrong. I had kept my drinking pretty well-hidden. But I was terrified because I knew that once I admitted how much I drank, I’d have to stop.
What surprised you about getting sober?
What’s surprising is that quitting drinking doesn’t automatically fix everything. Sure, you are happy to wake up without a hangover. Sure, you’re happy that you didn’t say or do something stupid the night before. But through the 12 Steps, I learned that drinking was not, in fact, my problem. The problem was I had a spiritual hole I had been filling with vodka.
What’s the biggest challenge you’ve encountered on your alcohol-free journey?
Navigating relationships is always the biggest challenge. Accepting people for who they are. My sponsor often directs me to read page 417 in the Big Book, which states: “And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.”
Also, I suffer from occasional bouts of depression, which I used to treat by drinking. Once I took away the alcohol, I had to address my mental health. I regularly attend therapy and have had to use psychotropic medications to get through some difficult times.
What are the biggest benefits or gifts of sobriety?
There are many gifts, including being present for my family. Being a sober mom is so important to me.
But here’s one you might not have heard before: I was so grateful to be sober when my mother passed away so that I could experience my grief in a healthy way. When my brother and sister died, tragically and prematurely, I drank my way through all those difficult feelings. With my mother’s death, I was able to feel the pain and came to realize that grief is just a form of love for that person. Without alcohol, I was able to embrace my love and grieve my mother’s passing properly.
What words of advice would you give someone who’s considering sobriety or newly sober?
Well, it’s a cliché and trite, but the best advice is to take it One Day at a Time. In early sobriety, to get through many difficult days, I would go to bed early and tell myself that I could drink the next day. But I never did. And go to AA. Being a part of a recovery community saved my life.
Please say hello in the comments, and consider sharing your sobriety story.
Thank you for sharing, Elizabeth. We look forward to connecting with you in the comments.
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